A Good Baby Makes You Feel Like You’re the Best Mom and…

A fussy, refluxy, colicky baby makes you feel like you’re the worst mom and have no idea WTF you’re supposed to be doing with them.

Caleb has been a complete angel baby, up until about 2 weeks ago that is. Interesting it coincided right with his 3 month birthday. He woke, ate, smiled and slept and then slept all night long. Now, not so much.

At first I just figured he was getting older and becoming more aware of his world which is why he was tougher to get to sleep at times. Then we tried to give him a bottle a couple times which he used to do just fine and suddenly he was not having it. He was awake for longer but also a lot fussier for many of those times he was awake which seemed different for him. Then he really stopped being put down for naps easily and its been much more of a battle. And he’d wake up often after just 30 minutes or so.

And then I started noticing him being super fussy while nursing, back arching, lots of wet burps and spit up and more hiccups and I am really afraid and starting to suspect his reflux is bothering him. Of course I’ve been nursing him this whole time and really dreading the thought of having to go on an elimination diet to rule out allergies (though I don’t think that’s what it is). I think it has more to do with my flow and letdown but I am not sure how to get around that. I pump most mornings after his first feed which is usually a sort one to get my supply down from the night before.

Day have been hit or miss with him. But nights *Knock on ALL the wood* have still been in tact and he’s been sleeping through – thank you God, Buddha, Allah and the universe for that one. I’m just getting the cold sweats thinking about how familiar this all is becoming. Julian was the exact same way – only like this from day 1 pretty much – and I am just not prepared to have another inconsolable, fussy baby on my hands especially with a 2.5 year old who needs my love and attention too.

I’m handling this potential transition to another fussy baby particularly bad because he was just such an easy angel baby at first. I thought I had it made! I thought I had paid my dues with the first one and now could enjoy the second.

Of course I have checked him for a fever and other signs of being sick but haven’t come up with anything. We’re heading to the dr’s this week for Julian’s 2.5 year check up (hold me!) so I’ll probably make an appt for Caleb to be seen at that point.

Please save me. I love my boys but cannot have another miserable baby on my hands again. Things were so good!


4 thoughts on “A Good Baby Makes You Feel Like You’re the Best Mom and…

  1. I feel like I’m watching my life thrive your post. My newborn has acid reflux and colic and I really feel like the worst mother at the moment 😭 glad I stumbled across this post. Great read


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